Reality Checks

Photo Credit: per phaendin

Photo Credit: per phaendin

Today I had a reality check in the form on an invoice from Squarespace.  This is the site that hosts my website and my domain is also registered through them. In the next few days I will owe them USD $116.00 (roughly XCD 310.00) if I wanted to keep online. That made me really sit up and take notice.




Firstly, I am currently embarking on some very exciting changes in my life. However, as exciting and rewarding as this journey has been… it is very expensive. The phrase “tighten your belt” has taken on an entirely too personal meaning for me over the last couple months. The big reason was the second one, though. I BARELY USE THIS SITE. If I got a dollar for the times I’ve brewed a cup of coffee, put on my favorite music and promised to recommit to the blogging process, I wouldn’t have to tighten my belt right now.


I sat there looking at the invoice trying to move around my budget to see if I could realistically shell out that kind of money this month. Then, I tried to consider whether it was worth it. Would I really blog any more than I already do? I am barely finding time to write (but that is another story for another day). Eventually, I decided that my car really didn’t have to be serviced this month (so if you see me stalled on the side of the road – give a struggling artist a ride, will you?).


I have always considered myself a writer who just happened to practice law and not the other way around. It is hard sometimes because there is so much damn responsibility with my job and I have so much more to show in my legal career than my writing one. In the worst of moments, I wonder if this is all a waste of time and if it wasn’t better to spend my free time binge watching Snapped (hint: I do that anyway).


The fact is I need to update this blog at least once per week (ideally twice) because it is important to have other small writing projects other than a main novel. It is a good way to hopefully pick up new readers. And, it is very important so that you don’t go bat-shit crazy and attempt to murder all the characters in your book.  I speak from experience.


This post could have been filled with profuse apologies for my delinquency and a detailed plan of how I intend to fix this and it very well nearly was. I decided at the last minute not to go down that too familiar road. I don’t need to apologize. I don’t need to plan. I need to do.


So in the words of the most illustrious Eminem, “Guess who’s back?”